“I have a big issue with trust.”
“I don’t trust anyone.”
“Trust has to be earned.”
“Once trust is broken it can never be fixed”
Have you ever heard yourself saying any of the statements above? Have you heard others same them to you? What does it feel like for you when you say those words? Do you feel completely justified in uttering these words, a righteous indignation that YOU must be right about trust or lack of. You of course, are completely trustworthy and would never do anything to betray that trust. Or would you?
These statements are just beliefs, belief in what the word ‘trust’ means to you, a belief that before you can give trust it has to be earned, a belief that no-one can be trusted because of past experiences, a belief that, quite frankly will hold you back and hold back beautiful open and honest relationships in the future.
I have had belief in the statements above because of experiences I have had in the past, starting with my first love asking me to get engaged, announcing it to my Mother and then went on and snogged her face off, denying it whilst I observed with my very own eyes. So a lot of my mistrust has been of men as they’ve all proved to me in some way or another that they “cannot be trusted”
Needless to all of my relationships have been fraught with feelings of dis-trust, mistrust and waiting, sitting waiting for them to prove me right again! Ha, see, told you so, told you that you’d betray me. With my head held in the air with great indignation.
However, through daily meditation and EFT on myself I made a choice to take responsibility for these feelings because they did not serve me. All they did was screw up my own head, gave me sick feelings in my stomach and create dis-ease in my body.
If we, therefore, accept that we are energy and we create everything as everything is created by us, then I have to accept that it is only I that can change my beliefs around trust. I decided it is not my right to put the responsibility of trust onto someone else. The individual will do what they will do whether you have given them trust or not. Why do we think we have the right to possess their actions, it really doesn’t matter what happens, we cannot ever know, we cannot predict the future, we cannot judge them based on either your past experiences or their past experiences. It never really existed. Release yourself today and free yourself from the negative energy these beliefs create, by accepting that we must live in the moment, right now, relinquish control forever, which is right now. You will experience a huge feeling of lightness of being, of freedom from the pain your beliefs have created for you.
By trusting yourself, your instincts, your intuition, whatever you want to call it then no-one can take away that trust, even if you feel that trust has been broken. You acknowledge it, you trust your own feelings about it and you make a choice about.
If trust is broken (which is only a belief), it is only broken for the other person, it is never broken for you, because you trusted, that’s all you can do is trust. That’s all you can be is trusting. It doesn’t matter anymore what actions others take, you cannot be responsible for their decisions or their actions, you can only be responsible for your reaction to it.
Trust, in my view can only come when we decide that beliefs are negative, we talk about limiting beliefs, really ALL beliefs are limiting because they close the mind, they close the mind to exploration of self, of discovery of self. Choose to have faith instead, faith keeps us open to possibilities, to new learning, to new discoveries. I’ve often been told ‘there is nothing else to discover’. I disagree, there is so much to discover about yourself if you have faith. Become an open book, let everything be open (yes I know it’s scary) become vulnerable, have a thirst for knowledge, for understanding YOU.
I am a work in progress, I choose to have faith in myself, in my abilities, to discover, to learn, to reflect, to process, again whatever that means for you. Be open, be a fresh canvas of discovery, allow life to flow naturally, stop going against the flow and just ‘be’ in the moment and enjoy. Let go of beliefs that stop the most beautiful, loving relationship you can ever have, and the most important relationship there is – that is the relationship with yourself.
Love and Divine Light
Written by Sunni Barnett – Author, Lifestyle Coach, Yoga Instructor.
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